#SpoonieChat

This past weekend I went to Kansas City with a couple of ladies from church to go shopping.  It was a spur of the moment decision to go with them on this trip.  I had thrown together some clothes and packed the necessities including my medicine.  Off we go, a couple hours in the van to get there before we hit our first store.

Normally I get very anxious about traveling. I love traveling. Don't get me wrong, but when you've had hip problems since you were eight, sitting for a long period of time is a difficult task, let alone in a cramped space.  I do have to say that it has been loads easier to travel for more than an hour in a vehicle since I had my hip replaced, but that doesn't mean it's easy peasy, lemon squeasy.  Because this trip was spur of the moment I didn't have the TIME to over think and get all antsy about the traveling portion of the trip.

I was wiped out when I got home on Sunday.  I thought it would just take all day Monday to regain my energy back from doing so much in the three day span that I was gone. I was oh so wrong.  I forgot about Thy, my thyroid. I forgot how much she makes me feel sluggish when I use my energy reserves.  I also forgot that I'm working on finding that happy medium of using my energy for things that I need to do and not just pointless things.  It completely threw me off.

Wednesday was the first day that I actually felt like I could do something.  It was probably because I didn't do much but sleep since I had gotten home on Sunday and that I was two days in taking my medicine (last week I kind of got off with my meds, and then it threw me off completely; I'm pretty good at getting back on track after I travel though) and I felt like I could actually accomplish some things.

I did! But then I think I might have overdone it because I sat there on the couch Wednesday night watching Survivor with my parents and brother.  By the time the Duck Dynasty (the show is very popular in our house!) Christmas special came on, I was so low on energy I didn't even pay attention to the show.  So, I did what I do when I get bored during commercials, I hopped on Twitter via my cell phone where I found #SpoonieChat

I'm not quite for sure exactly what the chat is aimed towards, but I think the general idea is to unite spoonies (people with chronic illness) together.  It was a fantastic time, though I only jumped in about halfway through the chat.  I found some questions that kind of framed the chat, and I wanted to take the time to answer them.

1. Do you find that your possessions weigh you down or suck away time that might be better used elsewhere? Possessions as in "stuff" that I've collected over the years? Yes. I'm constantly feeling the need to get rid of things, or wonder why I still have something when I can't remember the last time I used it.  I spend so much time thinking about it, or attempting to do something about it that I often get side tracked during my day and waste a lot of energy in the process, thus bringing my day down with me.
2. Are predetermined time commitments dictating what you do and how you do it? Sometimes commitments made years ago no longer make sense, but momentum keeps them going? I don't really think I have much of a problem with this. Much the opposite I believe. I can't commit to something and if I do and I break it, it's twice as much trouble for me to get back to it. For example, last year I made a pact with my roommate to do homework every day together in the library.  Once I didn't go once because I was feeling ill, I just didn't go again for several days.
3. Do you are too many goals pulling you in opposite directions?  I do feel that some of them are.  It's difficult to explain because that majority of my goals have changed in the last two to three weeks, so now I'm more in a mind frame of focusing on how to get to those new goals.  On a simplified level, my day to day goals of what I want to get accomplished sometimes pull me apart at the seems just because I feel the need to list everything and get it all done; talk about one way to drain energy quickly!
4. Are negative thoughts hampering your progress? Sometimes, we take these ideas as actual “facts”. What could you rethink?  I'm struggling with this one I think.  When I think about my goals and my progress, I think of how I said above that I want to get it all done, or in my post from Wednesday that I have this picture perfect plan, when I can't get it all done, or something falls out of this picture perfect plan my mind immediately begins to think of all the negatives.  That I should have done "this" instead of "that" and so on.  It's something I'm working on (I've said that a lot this week, should keep me busy before school starts!), that instead of thinking about the negative things when I can't get all of my to do list completed, or when my picture perfect plan goes out the window that I think about the positive things. For example, I had a long cleaning list the other day.  I wanted to clean my bedroom, but all I got done was my closet.  The positive? My closet was an absolute disaster and it took ALL day.  But it got done.

I've rambled enough for today, but at least that rambling was kind of therapeutic for me.